I am going to teach a lesson on elaborating in writing to my 5th grade class. Does anyone have any good examples of writing before and after elaboration or details have been added?
I don't, but I like the project. I teach grade five as well. I wonder if you ever play around with WriteWithMe or GoogleWave? It occurred to me that students might like to see the process of elaborating unfold in something like real time. Both applications allow for playback.
I use poorly written paragraphs that need a LOT of help to improve them. The topics are ones that they can relate to (I teach at the high school level). I present them with a piece of work that is truly boring to read and it is their job, in cooperative learning groups, to make it a piece of writing that will motivate people to read it.
I am in the process of finalizing a book on such activities that will be available in both PDF and book formats by June through my website.