It's so sad that I am your first friend, like, ever. Wow! I mean, I had friends as far back as the age of three, but, hey, if I can be a buddy for you now, in this new phase of life, call me the man. Wann go cow-tipping? That's what I do with my friends, and now that you are part of that good-ol'-boy network, you can have the first heifer we lay our longing eyes on. Just put your shoulder in to that pocket below the haunches and puuuuuuush like a hillbilly and a tractor.